What do you do when you’ve had a setback day?
Setback days are different for everyone. They’re days when progress feels lost for no reason, when motivation is nowhere to be found, and even when looking at the instrument can be painful. For me personally, as someone who struggles with anxiety, depression, and other chronic illnesses, nearly every day feels like a setback day. So what can you do when you have a setback day? Keep going.
First, try to identify the cause of the setback day. What’s going on?
Some setback days are easier to navigate than others, but they are all worth discussion. Being physically sick or injured may be a physical limitation that keeps music (and life, too) from happening. When you’re in the emergency room or bed-ridden ill, it’s impossible to access your instrument. That’s an obvious setback.
There are also mental clouds that can form, keeping musical achievement just out of reach. Have you hit a wall in terms of growth and excitement? Are you just sad? Have you been sleeping well? Are you afraid or anxious? Whatever the cause, acknowledge it, then move on. Dwelling on the subject (“I’m so anxious and I’ll never get started”) can make the subject worse.
Now that you’ve identified the cause of a setback day, what can you do to move forward?
When it’s a physically-limited setback day, do what you can to get back on track without stressing about it. Give your body the time it needs to heal. For example, when I have out-of-control days, I’ll schedule a gentler practice session for later in the day or to start out the next day. If you need to, it’s perfectly okay to change your entire approach to meeting a goal whether long or short term.
When it’s a mentally-limited setback day, do what you can to get yourself out of the funk. Ask yourself: now that I know what’s holding me back, what can I do to make things better? This is where it’s okay to take time to give yourself love. Have you showered or eaten lately? Give yourself an hour to do both things, then come back to your music. Have you been sleeping well? Make sure to plan the rest of your day so that you can go to sleep at a decent hour. Are you stressed about upcoming due dates? Make a list of everything you need to do and take small bites – do one thing at a time. Do you just need a little break? Go for a coffee, make tea, go on a short walk outside, pet a dog, or call a friend. If you’re stressed about musicianship, thinking about the stress can only prolong it. Change your scenery and see how you feel when you come back to it.
Don’t be afraid to ask for help!
It’s very possible that your professor, colleagues, and friends will have been through something similar to your setback. They will more than likely be able to offer help and support in recovering from your setback day. It’s always good to be communicative with those you are in close working relationships with. You don’t have to share too much, but ask if they can help you get back on track. Remember: you aren’t alone! You aren’t the only person who has ever experienced setbacks. Keep in mind that time will move forward whether you are ready for it or not, so you may as well be ready.
Breathe. Believe. Be. 